By Liz Eichler
Were you one of the lucky few who caught the World Premiere staging of Shards of an Honor Code Junkie (or the Boy Who Chooses to Grow Up) this past weekend? For just four performances (plus an invited dress), CCM Musical Theatre students brought Blake Allen’s autobiographical story to life — and what a gift it was to witness.
Allen has been shaping this project for several years now. There are earlier album versions streaming on Spotify and Amazon Music, described as an “American Opera.” It straddles musical theatre and oratorio, told through soaring choral harmonies and quiet confessions.
At its center is a young man attending “The Lord’s University” aka Brigham Young University (BYU) where the Honor Code dictates every aspect of student life. His parents are proud, but their pride comes at a cost. As he begins to understand himself more fully, he finds connection with other LGBTQ+ students, even though that community and their allies exist in the shadows. When a weekend trip to Salt Lake City exposes his secret, he’s called before the Honor Court. His honesty — ironically part of what the code demands — leads to punishment and isolation.
The story isn’t just about one faith or one school. It’s about the universal need to belong. It’s about what happens when love becomes conditional, when acceptance depends on compliance. “I don’t fit in,” he says, and discovers how difficult (and lonely) it is to be different. It is also the story of so many young people of all faiths who feel they don’t fit in with society or the lives their parents hope for them. (Even though the mother admits she rues the sacrifices she made, but focuses on the belief of eternal reward. This is one section of the story hope gets developed further.)
The Performance
I’ll be honest: I went into the matinee a little tired, but I left completely energized — by the talent, by the music, by the empathy running through every note, and by the energy of the mostly CCM student audience. The Church of Our Savior was the perfect setting. Sunlight streamed through the stained-glass windows while the students’ voices filled the sanctuary. The effect was stunning, both visually and spiritually.
Director and choreographer Vincent DeGeorge kept the staging simple and fluid, letting the actors and the music carry the emotional weight. The minimalism fit the sacred space beautifully, but a fully staged and lit production would add focus. Music director Ian Axness shaped an ensemble that sounded both angelic and raw. Josh Walden provided additional choreography.
Andy Bakun (Boy) as the lead has a voice rich with emotion, his honesty disarming. His eyes and expressions were filled with rich nuance, especially as he meets a new and interesting classmate. Ellie Eisele (Girl) matched him with remarkable vocal precision and empathy. As the cool older NYC sister, her songs had the most discordant notes, separating her from the students.
Max Patrick (Lost Child of God #1), Alexander Bowman ((Lost Child of God #2), Dominic Carroll (Lost Child of God #3), Morgan Lindell (Lost Child of God #4), Naomi Thuren (The Light), Gavin Poronsky (Luca/Swing) and Ilsa Denton (Jane/Swing) are fellow classmates and partners in “crime.” Their beautiful harmonies swelled through the church. Two mature alumni return as Mother and Narrator (Amy Luce), and Man (Nik Rocklin) play multiple roles with subtlety and strength.
The Music and the Message
Overall the music of Shards sounds like church with many hymn-like choral harmonies, organ, chimes, and reverent melodies that build into something transcendent. The exceptions include the sister’s powerful yet difficult “The Dream,” which Eiselle nails with raw emotion, and the mechanical “Honor Court,” reminiscent of Chicago’s rag song “We Both Reached for the Gun.” The music captures the push and pull between devotion and identity, between a code that demands obedience and a soul that longs for freedom. It is highly effective in building audience investment into these characters.
Allen’s writing doesn’t shy away from difficult territory (suicide, sexual identity, family conflict, and the long shadow of religious shame). It doesn’t wallow there, it reaches toward grace. If BYU represents conditional love, his sister and chosen family represent the opposite: unconditional love. The kind that says, “You’re enough, exactly as you are.”
Final Thoughts
This project is still in development, and it should definitely keep going. Shards asks big questions about faith, honesty, and the cost of belonging: What happens when honesty becomes a liability? When faith becomes a cage? And what does it take to finally fly free?
As one line reminds us “Everyone has their own weird world.” In Allen’s world, those shards may be broken, but they reflect something beautiful, that is the light that comes from being seen, of personal truths being reflected, and finally, from being free.
The Band consisted of Ian Axness, Caleb Hixon, Jake Sinsky and Georgia Holt. Kait Taylor was Production Stage Manager, Laila Gose Assistant Stage Manager, and Anna bell Mallard Sound Designer (a solid job in this soaring space). There are about 30 songs in the current 75 minute production.
Up Next at CCM
Get your tickets now for The Lightning Thief: The Percy Jackson Musical. This show promises to be amazing both musically and visually. Get tickets HERE for The Lightning Thief, running Oct. 23-25, 2025 at the Patricia Corbett Theater at the University of Cincinnati.
